M & L
By Sarah Kokernot, first published in West Branch
When a friend's wedding forces her to reunite with both a past flame and her former abuser, a young woman must confront some old wounds.
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Three old friends–Miriam, Gloria, and Liam–head out from their mutual friend's wedding reception to a nearby field in search of a neighbor's kind pet camel. Miriam and Gloria are bridesmaids; Miriam and Liam dated for three years in high school after Liam had a years-long crush on Miriam. When the three reach the field, the camel is nowhere to be seen, but they leave a carrot on the other side of the electric fence for the animal to find when it returns. Miriam, Gloria, and Liam return to the house where the reception is being held, and as they walk, Miriam thinks she sees Caleb on the balcony. She shakes her head — she's used to seeing Caleb everywhere, and this is clearly not him. As they order drinks, Miriam notices Liam's beer belly; he seems to have stopped working out since his college girlfriend broke up with him several months back. Liam fingers Miriam's arm, where a tattoo with each of their respective first initials used to be. Miriam recently got it removed. Liam's matching tattoo is still on his arm, though he tells people now that the 'M' stands for "Mom." Gloria brings Miriam up to the dressing room, where Beth, the bride, waits for them. Gloria and Beth anxiously ask Miriam if she saw Caleb. He was there, but they assure her that he's being escorted out of the party. They look at Miriam, expecting a reaction, but Miriam feels nothing. She vaguely wishes Caleb were still here to see how well she looks, how pretty. Miriam had been thirteen when she woke up in the woods behind the First Baptist Church wearing only her underwear. Later, Caleb would testify that he thought he had killed Miriam by accident and, in his panic, he had left her body there. Everyone in town had heard the story; everyone treated her differently afterward, except for Liam. Outside the wedding reception, Liam has returned to the field with the camel in search of his car keys, which have disappeared. He sees Beth's dad escorting Caleb to his car and feels a rush of rage at the sight of Caleb. Later, Miriam drags Liam to the dance floor, where he is awkward and clumsy. They are both drunk and attracted to one another. When the song ends, Miriam leaves the room, waiting for Liam. He follows her, into the grass and through the trees, knowing he should not have sex with her. And yet maybe, Liam thinks, it would make them both happy.
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