M&M World
By Kate Walbert, first published in The New Yorker
A middle-aged divorcee takes her two daughters to M&M world. When her younger daughter disappears in the crowd but is later found, the woman feels intense love for her children and a fear of being left alone.
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Ginny, a middle-aged divorcee living in NYC and dissatisfied with her life, reluctantly agrees to take her children Olivia (eldest) and Maggie (youngest) to M&M world, which they pass every day and she has promised she would take them to. Ginny sees this as a failure at her resolution not to qualify ("just this once"; "five more minutes"; etc.) and give in. Ginny is obsessed with all the things wrong with her life and her appearance. Ginny recalls a trip to the Patagonia region in Chile with her ex-husband before they had children. She took note of all the animals they saw. On a whale-watching boat, she decided to read on the shady side, her husband promising to call her if he saw anything, but it was she who saw a whale. Before the other passengers rushed to see, she felt she and the whale shared a meaningful moment, like it was trying to communicate something. On the way to M&M world, Ginny dwells on all the concerns she has always had for her children: that they would be injured on trampolines, climbing on statues, etc.. Maggie begs for ice cream and Ginny gives in, getting both the girls ice cream from an ice cream truck. After, the girls are racing and Olivia falls, scraping her knee. M&M world is completely chaotic, and Maggie disappears. Olivia mentions she was with some guy, and Ginny panics. Ginny recalls discussing with her ex-husband how to explain his leaving them to the kids. He thought they should just tell him, whereas she suggested a metaphor about building a fort, it being cramped in the fort, and taking space away from the fort. Looking for Maggie, Ginny gets help from two staff members, Wendy and Barbara, and a slew of other tourists. Ginny thinks about how when she saw the whale, she didn't call her ex-husband from the other side of the boat as he'd promised he'd do for her. She doesn't know why. She was just captivated by the whale. That night and after, whenever she was lost in her own little world, he would call her "whale hoarder." They find Maggie in one of the dressing rooms, with discarded M&M gear and a M&M towel over her head. She says she thought they left too. Ginny hugs both her children tight and leaves the store with them, thinking about how the whale disappeared into the sea, leaving her alone.
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