Out of Body
By Jennifer Egan, first published in Tin House
After an NYU student attempts suicide, he tries to navigate the awkwardness of his friend group and continues to pine after a girl who has a boyfriend.
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Plot Summary
Rob, a high school football star turned NYU student, smokes in Lizzie and Bix's apartment near NYU. Drew and Sasha are also there. Rob attempted suicide a few months back by slitting his wrists, and Sasha was the one who found him. Now, all of his friends are awkward around him and try not to upset him. He leaves with Sasha and Drew early. Rob thinks about how he knows Sasha so well: how she ran off to Europe after college, how she prostituted herself to make money, where she has a mole. He pretended to be Sasha's boyfriend for months when her father had sent a PI after her to make sure she was doing okay. Rob fell in love with her but never told her or made a move, not even when they slept in bed together. Now, Sasha is dating Drew. Rob takes a pill of E and offers one to Drew. The two get high together and Sasha goes home. Eventually, Bix, who is not allowed in his own apartment at the moment because Lizzie's racist parents are visiting, comes and joins them. The three have a wonderful night together. When Bix goes home, Rob lets it slip that he knows Sasha better than Drew does. Drew gets angry and calls Rob an asshole. When Drew tries to run away, Rob chases him. Drew takes off all his clothes and jumps into garbage-laden water. Rob does the same. When Rob gets caught in a current, he calls out for Drew. Rob thrashes around in the water, knowing he should not resist, as he remembers his promise to Sasha that he would never try to take his own life again.