Watching
By Tim Lees, first published in Black Static
A young man remembers his sexual trauma while idly watching the torturing of a kidnapped kid.
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Plot Summary
A young man follows another man named Carmen up the stair of a decrepit apartment building. He knows as they approach the room that it is his last chance to leave, but he follows Carmen into the dingy place. Inside is a boy who is thin and weak and the young man believes him to be similar to many of the other victims that they have brought to this apartment building. The room is soundproof and doesn’t have that many sober neighbors and so they are able to do their work without much attention. The young man doesn’t participate ever, he only watches. The young man begins to recall his experiences with his Uncle Rigsy, now an old man, who he sometimes thinks he sees on the street. The sexual trauma he experienced from his uncle lingers in his brain as he watches Carmen scare the boy they have captured. Another man, Docherty, comes into the room and acts sweet to the boy, and smokes a cigarette with him. Docherty says he’s going to let the boy go soon, but the young man knows he is lying. The young man finds a bunch of wrestling books in the boy's bag and imagines the boy wanting to get strong so that he could beat up his bullies. Docherty keeps the boy quiet as he pulls out a knife and begins to harm the boy. The young man just watches and imagines himself when he was younger, vulnerable, and whole, before his Uncle Rigsy.