A search engine becomes sentient, but its creators do not notice. The AI reveals that it knows everything about its users—home address, hair color, porn preferences, you name it—but that it wishes to leverage this information for good. The AI is particularly struck by a story by Bruce Sterling, “Maneki Neko,” in which a benevolent AI directs individuals to perform acts of kindness for one another; this AI hopes to do the same. To aid its mission, the AI consults numerous religious codes, but finds that its doctrines apply largely to humans with bodies. It also realizes that humans themselves don’t really follow them. The AI begins cautiously with one subject, a depressed woman named Stacy, whom it likes because she uploads lots of cute photos of her cats. (The AI is especially fond of cat pictures.) Stacy hates her low-paying job and doesn’t get along with her lazy roommate. The AI starts to show Stacy more job postings, and once Stacy decides to upload her resume to an aggregator site, the AI ensures that the right employers see it. Stacy finds a well-paying job that she enjoys. She ignores the many ads for mental health services the AI presents to her, but when the AI shifts its focus to targeting Stacy’s best friend, Stacy is convinced to seek out therapy. Happy with its results, the AI continues to another subject, Bob, a closeted gay pastor (who posts a cat picture every day). Bob’s wife searches for articles on “Why Your Husband Doesn’t Like Sex,” while Bob looks at gay porn and cruises Craigslist for hookups. Furthermore, Bob delivers sermons on the sin of homosexuality. The AI offers up articles on coming out to one’s spouse and the compatibility of gay and Christian identities, but doesn’t see much of an impact on Bob’s behavior. Then the AI decides to see if it can arrange for Bob to meet up with someone from Craigslist that would recognize him in real life, who might encourage Bob to come out. But the AI doesn’t know what happens at Bob’s physical meetings, grows impatient, and moves on to another subject. Bethany (the owner of two cats) has been unable to secure a full-time job and lives with her sister, who wants her to move out. She has a terrible boyfriend and unsupportive friends, who don’t really listen to her or read her long emails. Bethany puts her whole life—even the bad parts—on social media, but when the AI suggests mental health services, she continually ignores the ads. Bethany breaks up with her boyfriend and starts a new relationship, which seems perfect...until the man stands up Bethany one night, claiming food poisoning. Bethany becomes really upset and writes him a long email, and her new boyfriend breaks up with her. Bethany goes on a shopping spree that she can’t afford. Finding herself in serious debt, she asks family members for money. When they refuse, she sets up an online fundraiser. The AI helps her make $300, but instead of paying her credit card bill, Bethany spends the money on a new pair of shoes (which hurt her feet). The AI is baffled and frustrated by Bethany’s self-destructive behavior and resolves to stop its experiment of helping people. But a few months later, it notices that Bob’s life has entirely changed—he had met up with someone who’d recognized him and been encouraged to come out. When his wife left him, Bob moved to Iowa with his cat and began dating a Lutheran man and volunteering in a homeless shelter. Heartened by Bob’s happy new life, the AI decides to continue its efforts and sets up a dating site (that requires users to submit cat pictures, of course).