The Men
By Jane Mayhall, first published in Perspective
A young woman recounts three times in her life when she felt emotions of an unexplainable transcendent love: watching a ballet for the first time, making eye contact with an attractive librarian in high school, and listening to an old professor lecture during night classes at a university.
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Plot Summary
When an unnamed woman is eleven years old, she goes to the ballet for the first time. During the first act, she sits in the balcony seats, unable to see the stage very clearly, but during intermission, some friends suggest that she go down and sit closer. During a solo performance in the second act, the young male dancer catches her attention, and she becomes entranced by his grace and movements. When the performance ends, she feels a sense of loss, saddened that the magical moment, the accidental pleasure was over. As she leaves the auditorium and walks home with her parents, she knows she will never forget the young ballet dancer. Another time, when the woman was a senior in high school, she has been studying in the school library when she observes the school librarian. He is a young and attractive man who likes to flirt with the students. A couple girls talk to him while she looks on, drawn from her studies. For an instant, the librarian looks over at her, and when their eyes meet, he smiles. In that moment, the young woman feels a strange sensual desire, not for the librarian himself, but rather for the momentary ecstasy between them. Later, after the woman has moved to New York City, she begins taking night classes with a friend at a nearby university. On one night that has been especially cold, they are in the warm classroom chatting before class begins. The professor, an old but sturdy man, comes in and begins to lecture. As the young woman listens, she notices a feeling of pleasure overcomes her as she listens to the sound of the professor's voice more so than his words. Looking around the classroom, she can tell that the other students, male and female, have become enthralled as well. The young woman recalls the dancer and the librarian. She is unsure what to make of the experience, but she knows that she is in love with the room and the atmosphere that the professor has created. The feelings from the three experiences are all present at that moment, unable to be felt or recalled at other times. When the lecture ends, they all go casually out into the cold.
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