As I Was Going Up the Stair
By Alfred Chester, first published in The Sewanee Review
Frequent beatings from his father and the casual dismissal of his childhood fears lead to the deterioration of a boy's mental health, and the loss of the only 'real' person in the world leaves him in despair.
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Plot Summary
Throughout the course of his life, David runs away from home three times. The first is because he is scared of Henry IV, convinced that the king is going to throw him into the tower for refusing to do his chores. The second time he runs away is because his mother warns him that God is always watching. In order to hurt God, David begins wrenching the legs off of ants and blinding birds. His mother is horrified – he runs away once again and is certain that God is no longer looking. The third time is because of the Politicians – he calls the three of them liars, and his father beats him relentlessly for such rudeness. After this, David is convinced that people are not real; they only send their ‘ghosts.’ When there are guests at their house, David comes out and recites poetry as he is instructed, but even as he does this, he does not send ‘all of him’ out – only ‘parts of his ghost’ to entertain the ‘ghosts’ of everyone else. The guests already think he is a strange, lonely boy, and encourage his parents to ensure that he makes friends. One of the girls he plays with screams in fright when he says that everyone is a ghost, and accuses him of touching her breasts. He is beaten once again by his father, but it makes no difference to him. Then David falls sick, and everyone is sure that he will not recover; but he does, and proceeds to live his life in whichever manner that will keep his parents at bay. He goes out for long walks, and on one of these walks he meets a street singer, ‘Miranda,’ who agrees that everyone is a ghost. She is pregnant, and is convinced that the child is the only real person in the world. Entranced by the possibility of a real person, David follows her, but when she begins to give birth, he demands that she stop right now, or this ‘real person’ will be condemned to living like a ghost. In the confusion, he is pulled away and finds himself with his parents once more; his mother’s concerns are interrupted when he tells them to leave him alone.
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