A sassy female cyborg named Aria is on a mission to save the universe from an evil love contagion emanating from the space creature Zarzak. Once beings are infected, all they can think about is how much they love Zarzak. Zarzak has already consumed Earth, and Aria is, perhaps, the universe's last hope.

The story starts out with Aria and her globular sentient spaceship companion, Beeblax. Beeblax and Aria have a conversation about love and companionship before Aria leaves to travel to the planet body of a space god, The Drowning King. On The Drowning King, Aria encounters other alien forms. First she survives a psychic attack from a Braincube that has already been infected by Zarzak. Begrudgingly, she takes the Braincube with her as a companion on the rest of her journey. Before she can reach the spire where Zarzak dwells, she encounters the Fuckboys of Zarzak. The Fuckboys are all in battle with one another and Aria must deftly maneuver through the battle field to make it to the spire. Once she makes it through the battlefield with her companion Braincube, she encounters T.A.R.C.T.I.L. (the Tactical Assault Robot Created to Increase Love) whom she must persuade to let her into the spire. It takes a few days and several quippy philosophical debates, but eventually Aria convinces T.A.R.C.T.I.L. that Zarzak must be destroyed.

Aria enters the spire and comes face to face with Zarzak. She falls under Zarzak's spell but T.A.R.C.T.I.L. saves her life and together they destroy Zarzak. The story ends with Aria's leaving The Drowning King and musing about the nature of fancy and desire.