Writing to an author for his local newspaper, Ken expresses extreme satisfaction after reading Terrance's article on why same-sex marriage should not only be illegal, but in fact, there should be an amendment to the constitution outlawing it. But, Ken takes it a step further than Terrance does, saying that not only same-sex marriage should be illegal, but "samish-sex marriage" should be as well. Listing off several personal examples he's witnessed, Ken argues this on the basis of several relationships of feminine men with masculine women. For example, a male friend of his with effeminate hips and a ponytail dating a stocky female with a crew cut—"is this not almost a same-sex relationship?", he asks. Since the woman evinces a taste for the feminine and the man has a taste for the masculine, are they not on the verge of entering same-sex relationships? Citing another couple, Ken brings up a male friend of his with a small penis and his female partner who knows a lot about cars. This couple is teetering dangerously close to a same-sex relationship, but Ken knows exactly how to solve this problem. Developing a manly scale that measures masculine traits, Ken suggests that no couple should be allowed to date unless they have a difference of 10 on the scale, ensuring that no overly feminine men date overly masculine women. And, if the couple does not meet this requirement, then they must simply embody their respective gender's traits more until they do. This is very easy work—Ken himself did it. Years ago, his hair was long and he found himself talking effeminately, so he practiced his mannerisms until they were deliberately masculine. As for his hair, he is now going bald, therefore becoming more masculine with every passing day. Ending his letter, Ken ensures that this is the only way that the human race can live on.